Flashy Wings Ministry

                                             Discover the queen in you

                                                         Loving Myself As A Single Lady!

Some Ladies believe they are incomplete because the are single. Such feelings can make a lady very vulnerable. Being single is a beautiful thing, it is  a time to discover yourself and get to do things that gives you fulfillment without limitations. It is alright to desire relationship and companionship, but as you are working towards that, you should love yourself and enjoy the benefits that comes with being single.    

Nobody Can Make you happy

It is alright to be unhappy with your single statues, but if you are generally unhappy that might pose a threat to your future relationship. 

Some ladies are still deluded into thinking that a man coming into their lives, will resolve their issues of unhappiness. But no one can really make you happy, if you are not happy in yourself. Being very  unhappy are signs that they are things that needs to be resolved within you, it will be better to deal with such issues before starting a relationship. happiness is a choice, when you express happiness it radiates and attracts people to you.  

You Don't Have To Be Prefect 
If at one point in your live, you have been in a relationship or relationships that didn't work out, it is very easy to fall into the pity party of "i am not good enough"
In every relationship that did not work out, there is always something to earn, it dose not matter who was at fault. Life is a teacher and we learn from our experiences, which should  enable us to make wiser decisions in future. No one is perfect, you don't have to change yourself because you want a man, you will only make a good pretender when you get into a relationship.
If you think you need to change some certain things in your life, the desire to  change has to come from you and  for your sake, through that process you can enjoy a  healthier relationship in the future.


Don't Lie To Yourself 

Some single ladies claim that they are happy being single and free, but in reality they are  very unhappy about their single status, lying about their feelings is purely ego in action. However they are woman that are very happy with being single, the have chosen that path and they are contended with their decision. But for ladies that pretend to be happy, there is nothing wrong with admitting that you need a companion. bragging that you don't need a man meanwhile you are dying inside does not make you a supper woman rather it makes you a frustrated woman, being true to yourself is liberating that will enable you to wait for the right man at the right time.     


Avoid Distractions 

As a single lady you have to set goals and boundaries for yourself. your need for a relationship must not becloud your balance sense of judgement. Single ladies are constantly meeting men that are predictors. the fact that you are single dose not make you available for any man that wants to sow is wild oaths. In some  cases you have your Ex trying to come in out of your life or a man  that just want convenient relationship without any nobble intentions. Some ladies do fall prey, but  this can only lead to devastation. Once you keep your focus and discipline, it is very difficult for anyone to distract you, that also shows a woman in control which is a very liberated place to be.  

Be of Healthy Mind Set

Some women are single because of a negative ideology or past hurts in their relationship. In our world today  there are different kinds of philosophies about the role of men and women. Some women have joined the feminist movement where the do not only ask for equal rights for women but total female dominated society. In recent times we have seen women say things like "i don't need a man" " i can look "after myself" "i can have sex with myself" i can do anything i wish with myself". Some of this theories are really dangerous and can lead to perversion and the fall of society. Some ladies go as far as taking in toy boys others have affairs with married men, happy to be side chicks etc. without any sense of shame. Doing immoral things like this, does not make you happy rather it devalues you.

It is good to have a healthy mindset towards the opposite sex, you might have been hurt in the past but remember the world still have good men. Working towards emasculating men is not the answer, but sharing the world together with a sense of responsibility and respect is what makes us human and beautiful.   

Be Resourceful 

Yes! you are single right now, it might not be for long, cherish every moment, and have lot's of fun, marriage is a beautiful thing but the commitment of marriage can restrain people from doing some  things they find fulfilling, while you are waiting for the right person, involve yourself in resourceful or fun activities, so that when you look back on your life you can relive beautiful memories.      

Be patient 

Waiting for the right person, is not as easy or straight forward for everyone. Waiting is part of the preparation process. Waiting does mean you should sit still whist watching the clock tick, it is a way of investing and discovering yourself for a blissful relationship. Waiting is very healthy it gives you time to process things and helps you to put things in the right perspective. Waiting also gives you time to uproot any unwanted weeds in your life, that can pose a threat to your future relationship. Stay cool calm and collected, while things works out.  

Make Sure You Are Healed

If you had  bad experiences in your past relationships, don't rush into another before you are fully healed of the hurts, some ladies can't stand not being with a man, they are always in and out of relationships, that is emotional instability, it is because they are not healed and they are afraid of rejection. relationship breakups can lead to other complications like low self esteem, depression, anger/resentment, ill health etc. that is the reason  rebound is not the solution, learning to love yourself again and staying happy should be the focus, as time helps you with the healing, you can find love again.   

Choose Wisely

Wrong choice of men might have contributed to the heartbreaks you have experienced. Don't get into a relationship for superficial reasons, look within "deeper than the surface" deeply reflect on your past relationships  and don't make the same mistakes.  You will encounter different kinds of men declaring love to you, if you can create boundaries and can  truly discovered your true worth, indeed you will be able to separate the sheep from goats.   


Be Prayerful

It is  best to commit all your affairs to the lord. Cases like going into a relationship or staying single are very serious issues, so many ladies are left with questions and no answers. How do i know the right guy?  how long will i be single? is it me or the guys? so many questions. That is why it is important to pray, because God has got a way of shining his light on things are gloomy in our lives, for He makes all this beautiful in his time.  


Study the word of God 

The Bible has got answers, encouragement and promises for every situation we find ourselves, studying the bible brings hope and replenishment, that helps us to carry on. The grace of God is sufficient, but if we don't read His words and cling to His promises, how can it be effective in our lives? resting in the Lord and taking refugee in His word his very rewarding.     

Let The Holy Spirit  Lead you 

When Jesus was leaving us in the flesh He promised to send the Holy spirit a teacher and a comforter that will guide us.

The Holy spirit is still at work today, when you depend on Him, you can never fail in any decision that you make, because He is the perfect spirit of God, many ladies are making mistakes because they don't seek the Holy spirit for guidance, if  we can understand this truth and apply it, we will live the life of a winner.    

           By Queen Ekuerhare


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